4 words: hood of his car
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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