yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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