I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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