I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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