my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
vagina is talking i cant
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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