just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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