so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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