fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize