There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
