Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
