went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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