we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
