is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
