I heard we made out
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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