She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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