You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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