If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
