The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
