Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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