Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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