so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
