what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
