I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did angry sex become our thing?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Pooping to opera.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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