So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize