Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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