Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
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I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
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Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
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