I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
