it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Randomize
