Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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