sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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