Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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