I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
