What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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