He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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