hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize