having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
