So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Randomize