people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
