Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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