I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
