I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize