fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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