she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
