I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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