I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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