my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
My breasts were aching with rage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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