I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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