I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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