About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize