My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
